A Very Odd Harvest Play-Play Script

A Very Odd Harvest Play is a comedy about two intergalactic tourists, Man and Woman. When they land on a blue-green planet for a nice picnic, they find themselves stranded with no way home and no supplies. Venturing on a quest for food and a decent cup of coffee, they must enlist the aid of the planet’s unusual inhabitants. Mythologies collide in comic fashion in this wonderful play for teens!

Elizabeth Rapoza first began writing plays for and with children over 30 years ago. The first thing she noticed was that there were few plays for children with rewarding roles for every actor. Liz felt that each student deserved (and frequently paid) to have the same experience, she began "Backyard Dramatics", a youth self-scripting curriculum. In these workshops, student actors create plots and characters based on stories invented by the students. These are then carefully scripted by Ms. Rapoza and performed by the students. Liz's plays are kid and audience tested across the country and around the globe. Her youth play, "Perstephanie Goes Underground" won the Boston Public Schools Short Play Development Award. Her adult radio comedy "The Amazing Adventures of Pajamazon" was a in winner in Mae West Fest of Seattle's search for the Ultimate Female Protagonist. Her plays have been performed at venues such as SlamBoston and the Factory Theater Boston. In addition, Liz is a professional actor, dancer, musician/vocalist, puppeteer and costumer. She has taught college theater courses since 2003 and currently teaches at Cape Cod Community College. Contact Liz at: [email protected].

Excerpt from the play:

CAST OF CHARACTERS

NARRATOR: (m or f) 50’s radio melodrama-like
MAN: (m) A hungry humanoid alien
WOMAN: (f) Ditto
RENARD: (m or f) A fastidious fox
RAVEN: (M or f) A sage squawker
CORN MAIDEN: One of the three sisters of Native American Folklore
BEAN MAIDEN: One of the three sisters of Native American Folklore
SQUASH MAIDEN: One of the three sisters of Native American Folklore
SUN GUY: (m) Personification of the sun who surfs the sky
EARTH MOTHER: Personification of the Earth

(Pastoral music plays. The NARRATOR enters and stands downstage right)

NARRATOR
Once upon a time, hurtling from the distant reaches of space, (pause, music) a bright light flashed across the night sky and came to rest over an unsuspecting blue-green planet. (Pause) A long silver thread fell from the sky.

(Rope falls and dangles from above the stage area)

Down the thread… down, down, down derry down the thread came two mysterious figures.

(MAN and WOMAN mime climbing down a rope, then look around, taking photos like tourists)

MAN
Whew! I told you we should have taken the elevator.

WOMAN
This looks like a nice spot. Set up the picnic things over there in the shade and then let’s go explore and look for food…

MAN
Sure. Where’d you put the basket?

WOMAN
Where did I put the basket!? Didn’t you bring it?

MAN
Um… well, I thought you had it.

WOMAN
Oh, Man! Guess you’ll have to climb back up and get it. Make sure you grab the tent too.

MAN
(Looks up the rope in dismay. Tugs on the cord morosely. The cord falls)
Oops.

WOMAN
You did that on purpose! Now we’re stuck here with no shelter and no supplies. What are we going to do without our coffee? (Starts to cry) and… and our new instant hot espresso drink device with the lactose steamer! (Sobs)

MAN
(Patting her shoulder) Do not despair, Woman. We’ll think of something.

(He looks around as if searching for something)

MAN (CONT.)
Look! (Points) The sun is coming up! You can work on your tan.

WOMAN
(Still pouting) Pooh! Only one sun? How lame is that?

MAN
Seems bright enough to make all this green stuff grow. C’mon… (nudges her playfully) Let’s go for a walk and see if there are any intelligent life forms. You know that always cheers you up.

WOMAN
(Reluctantly) Okay. Okay.

(They mime walking and follow the NARRATOR’S cues on actions to mime)

NARRATOR
And so they traveled through field and forest, over wide plains of grass and through thorny thickets of thistle and rose briar. They encountered many birds and beasts and bugs, but found these, for the most part, to be timid and uncommunicative.

MAN
Look! Over in that field. (Pointing) See? That large four-legged creature with one horn on the side of its head?

WOMAN
(Excited) I see it! I wonder if it’s edible. Go ask it for directions and if it won’t talk let’s eat it. I’m so sick of berries.

(MAN runs off. He mimes talking to someone as if asking directions. WOMAN taps her foot impatiently. MAN runs back)

WOMAN
Well?

MAN
Well, I asked him the way to the nearest resort spa or civilization of some sort…

WOMAN
(Impatient) What did they say?

MAN
Moooooooove away from my field. This is my field. Mooove…

WOMAN
Restaurant? Deli? Convenience store? Anything! (Getting hysterical) As long as they serve coffee! (Suppresses a sob)

MAN
I think we’ve come at a bad time. They’re still in the primitive stage here. Nothing but beasts and bugs and plants and stuff. I’m… I’m sorry.

WOMAN
(Wiping her eyes) Don’t blame yourself. I was navigator.

MAN
Old One-horn over there did point the way to a stream (points) that way. Let’s take a swim and then do some fishing.

(MAN and WOMAN mime walking again)

NARRATOR
And so on they went, following the path of the big bright yellowish thingie past lots of green leafy thingies until they came to the stream. There they saw a strange creature…

(RENARD enters and mimes bathing)

WOMAN
What a strange creature.

NARRATOR
(Gives WOMAN a dirty look) Swimming serenely in the stream…

WOMAN
Did you ask One-horn if we could eat it? You know, just in case there’s no fish…